6 Words I Never Say When Babies are Starting Solid Foods

Katie Ferraro (0s):

If you are a type A super planner like me, you love getting organized about what solid foods your baby is going to eat. I have a free feeding guide for you. You're gonna love this one. It's called the Baby-Led Weaning Pantry Planning Guide. It's a 10 page checklist divided by categories of foods, many of which you probably already have on hand. Plus, there's tips in there on how to modify those foods so there's safe for your baby. You can download the Baby-Led Weaning Pantry Planner for free. If you go to my website, babyledweaning.co/resources. Again, that's babyledweaning.co/resources. Click on the Pantry Planner and it's free checking in on your infant refresher CPR core status. Have you taken CPR R recently? Actually, everybody who helps feed your baby should know CPR because while there's no higher risk of choking with Baby-Led Weaning compared to conventional spoon feeding, CPR can save your baby's life.

Katie Ferraro (46s):

The course I take every quarter is available online. It's incredibly thorough, but it's also concise. You can get $10 off your online CPR R course registration with my affiliate discount code Katie 10. The website you sign up at is bit ly slash online CPR Course we don't call people with diabetes diabetics, right? People with cancer aren't called cancers. When we define our children as being a quote unquote picky eater, whatever you wanna call it, selective eater learning, eater preference development, whichever term you choose, please know that quote unquote picky eating is developmentally appropriate for toddlers picky eating is not a problem to be fixed. Hey there, I'm Katie Ferraro, registered dietitian, college nutrition professor and mom of seven specializing in Baby-Led Weaning.

Katie Ferraro (1m 32s):

Here on the Baby-Led Weaning with Katie Ferraro podcast, I help you strip out all of the noise and nonsense about feeding, giving you the confidence and knowledge you need to give your baby a safe start to solid foods using Baby-Led Weaning. If you had to choose between the two, what do you like more language or math? If I had to choose between language and math, I would say I'm definitely more of a words person. My day is not complete. If I can't at least get the pangram on New York Times spelling bee do wordle, and then depending upon how many kids sporting events I have to sit through the daily crossword puzzle too.

Katie Ferraro (2m 14s):

If there's time. I love words. I think words matter. And having worked as a dietitian for nearly 25 years and the last eight of those exclusively in infant feeding and Baby-Led Weaning, I know that the words that I choose when teaching parents and caregivers and other healthcare providers matters too. And language evolves, right? Cultural and political events that shape our landscape also shape our language. And so I know I'm always refining the language and the words that I use in teaching and in my content in order to get my point across succinctly and accurately in a way that resonates with parents. In today's episode, I wanna hear six words that I know longer say when I'm talking about or to babies who are starting solid foods or their parents.

Katie Ferraro (2m 55s):

These are words that I steer clear of when I'm writing my podcast outlines or the scripts for lessons inside of my Baby-Led Weaning program or captions for Instagram reels or the weekly emails that I send out to my email list, YouTube scripts, you name it. If you use these words, hey, more power to you. I just did a major overhaul of my own online program, Baby-Led Weaning with Katie Ferraro, I re-scripted, and then we re-shot 44 short lessons that go in the three different phases in our program. I realized how much the wording that I use now has evolved even though even from earlier versions of our program. And there's a few words that I no longer use that kinda like stuck out to me. Like I would read the old script and be like, I cannot believe I used to say that I wanted to put them into an episode. So I'm sharing six words that I never say to or about babies who are starting solid foods.

Katie Ferraro (3m 39s):

I like to start out each of these mini training episodes with a Baby-Led Weaning tip of the day. Today's tip is try not to excessively cheerlead when your child is starting solid foods. I remember I was interviewing the goddess Marsha Dunn Klein in an episode for this podcast a while back, and we were talking about the topic of staying in your lane when you're helping babies learn how to eat. And I said that some of the parents that I work with in coaching sessions, for example, for Baby-Led Weaning, they just micromanage the heck out of the feeding environment. Like they're always touching and adjusting and wiping and praising and talking at the poor baby who doesn't have a second to themselves to really focus on learning how to eat.

Katie Ferraro (4m 19s):

And by the way, babies need lots of those quiet times to learn how to eat. So Marsha, who definitely has a way with words, if ever there was one, said, Katie, instead of saying that these parents are micromanaging, why don't you talk about the benefits of not excessively cheerleading for the baby? And I love that. If you wanna hear more wisdom from Marsha Dun Klein from the Get Permission Institute. She's the OG in pediatric feeding. She's a feeding therapist, product developer author. She literally wrote the book on pre feeding skills. Go back and listen to episode 206, Stay in Your Lane Parent and Baby Roles in Infant Feeding. That's with Marsha Dunn Klein. But hang tight, because in this episode, Marsha's not here, but I'm channeling her. I have six words that I don't use about starting solid foods.

Katie Ferraro (5m 1s):

And the last one, I was just gonna do five, but then I had to, I could not leave this one out because I am floored at this word and how fast it has become like a toxic topic among parents who spend a lot of time on and are especially influenced by social media. So let's get started. The first word is obese or obesity. Okay? This is a definite shift in the nutrition landscape. Certainly since I started this podcast in 2020, I have made every attempt to avoid the use of the word obese. I remember when I launched the podcast back when Instagram story reviews were like through the roof and everybody would participate if you asked them a question. I was like, what topics do you want me to cover? And I remember this mom being like, I think my baby's too fat. And I was like, I cannot have a podcast episode about you thinking your baby is too fat.

Katie Ferraro (5m 44s):

And we don't talk about babies with regards to their weight. 'cause the term obese is often associated with negative connotations, right? It can carry a sense of moral judgment or blame. And this can lead to feelings of shame or guilt for individuals who are described this way, especially when we're discussing babies or young children who will turn into older adults that will be affected by that language. I'm a registered dietitian. I previously worked in diabetes management and cardiovascular nutrition. I was in private practice where obesity, and I'm talking with the doctors, that's a medical diagnosis. Okay? I remember it was a big deal when obesity was actually given a diagnosis code. Okay? You or practitioners, you might not like the use of the term, but obesity is still used in a medical, in healthcare setting because it is considered to be a diagnosis.

Katie Ferraro (6m 29s):

The ICD 10, which replaced the ICD nine in 2015 in the United States, expanded the codes for obesity, right? That's the way it works is follow the money trail. If you, if you can bill for it and help treat it and there's science to help treat it, then you need the diagnosis code so that we make sure we're treating the right people. So there are codes that are obesity due to excess calories. There's drug induced obesity, there's morbid also called severe obesity. There's other obesity. There's obesity unspecified. But like using obese, it can overly medicalize a condition. Okay? And I would never want to reduce a person's identity to a single characteristic. Obesity is a very complex and chronic disease characterized by excessive amounts of body fat. Okay?

Katie Ferraro (7m 9s):

It's associated with various health risks. Things like heart disease and diabetes, hypertension, certain cancers, we recognize obesity as a medical diagnosis. But as healthcare providers, I know personally I have to address it within the context of overall health and treat it with appropriate interventions. And this is not an important emphasis for the infant population that I work with. Okay? In young children and babies, using the word obesity could be problematic 'cause it leads the parents to focus on weight as a primary concern rather than the overall health development wellbeing of the child. So as a dietitian, I'm trying to promote a weight neutral approach. I work with parents to foster habits without trying to attach any moral value to body size. I have had researchers on the podcast, we've talked openly about alternative phrases to obesity.

Katie Ferraro (7m 54s):

Okay? Some prefer high BMI where BMI stands for body mass index. Personally, I work with an infant population. This is not relative, okay? I do not get into detail talking to parents about high BMI or being above the 95th percentile for weight. I know some of my colleagues will use the term higher weight. Okay? I like to refer if we're talking about a child's growth development and their growth pattern, we talk about their growth pattern. I wanna emphasize the importance of tracking trends over time rather than focusing on a specific weight category. So ideally, my intent is to help parents with their kids' nutritional health or overall health and shifting the focus from weight to a more comprehensive view of the child's wellbeing. Do that by not using the O word. Hey, we're gonna take a quick break, but I'll be right back.

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Katie Ferraro (10m 29s):

Word number two, I try to avoid in my infant feeding practice is kind of along the same vein, but it's the word healthy. When we label foods as healthy or unhealthy, it contributes to a moralization of the food where certain foods are seen as good and other foods are seen as bad. And then this is just gonna lead to feelings of guilt or shame around eating. And that can negatively impact a child's relationship with food as they grow older. We have no shortage of parents in our program. We're like, I am here 'cause I have a messed up insert other expletive up relationship with food and I don't wanna project my food stuff onto my child. We have done episodes about your child being a blank slate and done a lot of work with psychologists and and how we deal with that because food is not just about nutrition, food is about so much more and our babies who've never encountered food are just starting to explore a variety of foods.

Katie Ferraro (11m 18s):

And that's of course happening before they have total language comprehension. So we wanna use neutral language to help them accept a wider range of foods without preconceived notions. I see plenty of parents projecting their weird diet, culture behavior and food choices and terminology onto their children. I think it's important as a dietitian to use neutral language. And as every dietitian knows, we're trained, it's literally beaten in your brain. In dietitian school. There are no good foods or bad foods, but parents use that language all the time and sometimes without realizing how impactful their words are. If our ultimate goal in starting solid foods is to get your baby to try a wide variety of foods, then we want to talk about the benefits of whole foods. Okay? Foods that support growth, a balanced selection of food.

Katie Ferraro (11m 58s):

So we don't grant too much credence to or demonize certain types of foods or food groups or nutrients. Okay? I don't find myself talking about nutrient density with babies. 'cause of course, like the most nutrient dense food that they're consuming is infant milk, right? You continue to offer breast milk or formula and that's a primary source of nutrition even as the baby is starting solid foods when it comes to bigger kids. I know in my own family I have seven school-aged kids. Even though it's my intent that we use neutral language about food and bodies at home, they still get super messed up messages from their peers and at school. And like even the stuff that the well-intentioned teacher say, I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't believe what you did that homework assignment on good and bad foods when it comes to foods that are higher in sugar or salt or certain types of fat, we try to talk about foods to enjoy in moderation.

Katie Ferraro (12m 40s):

For the younger kids, we sometimes call that the sometimes foods, but by using alternatives to the word healthy, my intention is to create a positive inclusive approach to food that supports balance relationship with food throughout life. 'cause that's what we're doing here. We're establishing your child's foundational relationship with food for the rest of their life. No pressure, right? Like that's a very, very, very big task. Third word after obese and healthy that I do not use, especially when I'm talking about babies is the word enough. As in parents are always asking, is my baby eating enough? Oh, I'm worried that they're just not getting enough. Oh, he didn't have enough at this meal, so I'm just gonna push a pouch into his mouth at the end of the meal. Or shove the spoon of puree into his mouth 'cause he's not getting enough.

Katie Ferraro (13m 23s):

One of the reasons why you'll never see a portion size guide in any of the content that I create is because there's no such thing as an evidence-based correct amount of food that your baby quote unquote should be eating. Okay? When you see a Baby-Led Weaning portion size guide, please know that that is completely fabricated, literally made up out of thin air. Every baby when given the opportunity to feed themselves, is going to choose a different amount of food than the baby sitting right next to them. Okay? If you've had multiples or have multiples or you have a daycare and you see babies eating together, they don't all eat the same amount of food at the same time and that's totally fine. Okay? That same baby, if you only got one at a time, they're gonna eat more or less of that same food than they did the day before or the day after.

Katie Ferraro (14m 3s):

There's no right or wrong amount of food to feed your baby. I covered this topic in depth back in episode two 15. We talked about Portion Distortion and why aren't there set portion sizes for Baby-Led Weaning? Do not stress yourself out about whether or not your baby is eating enough. Alright? The next word that is like nails on the chalkboard to me is when parents talk about their baby and describe them as a picky eater, okay? The word picky referring to your child as a picky eater. Other food cultures, they call it fussy or selective. They're saying the same thing, picky eater, problematic for a couple of reasons. When we label a kid as a picky eater, the parents might unconsciously reinforce this behavior by lowering their expectations or limiting the variety of foods that are offered.

Katie Ferraro (14m 48s):

Okay? The child may internalize this label that can in turn lead to more selective eating habits and a restricted diet over time. When I was working in diabetes, I remember that one of the first things you learned was we don't refer to people with diabetes as diabetics. Okay? You don't call like the term diabetic, that is nails on the chalkboard, okay? That's reducing a person down to an identification structure based solely on their diagnosis or disease state. And I remember the first time that concept was introduced to me, I kind of rolled my eyes. I was like, dude, people with diabetes are diabetics. And our instructor was like, no, they're not. Like you don't call people with cancer. Cancer s right? People with diabetes in the medical literature and when you're charting, you abbreviate that PWD, they're people with diabetes. So picky eating, whatever you want to call it, selective eater or learning eater or preference development, whichever term you choose.

Katie Ferraro (15m 34s):

Please know that picky eating as we understand it with toddlers, is a totally developmentally appropriate phase for toddlers to go through. Picky eating is not a problem to be fixed. As your child crosses over into the second year of life, they will start to eat less of a variety of foods than they did when they were a baby. And that does not make you a bad parent. We hear parents that say, I did Baby-Led Weaning, and now my toddler doesn't eat as many foods as they did when they were a baby. Okay? So they're just being a toddler, okay? The whole premise of the 100 First Foods approach is to help parents increase the variety of foods that babies are introduced to during the flavor window.

Katie Ferraro (16m 14s):

Okay? The flavor window precedes the picky eating phase. This is this wonderful phase in development where babies will like and accept a wide variety of foods. And we all know that with toddlerhood after the one year mark, sometimes for children, it's as late as two years of age, it will start that they will be less adventurous. They're going to start eating less foods than they did when they were a baby. If your child only has nine or 10 foods when they turn one, which is what most children who start solid foods with a conventional adult-led spoonfed approach, if you're pushed purees in your mouth, you'll have nine or 10 foods that you've tried by the time you turn one. If you lose those nine or 10 foods to picky eating in the second year of life, that becomes a very challenging child to feed, right? Those are the children that end up in feeding therapy.

Katie Ferraro (16m 56s):

But if your baby has a 100 foods that they can eat before they turn one and then you lose nine or 10 of those to picky eating, it's not such a big deal, right? 'cause you still have 85 or 90 foods that your child will eat. So that's the underlying premise of the 100 First Foods approach is to help babies get exposure to all of those foods that they will eat when that flavor window is open. Now, certainly there are instances where severe picky eating will turn into a medical situation where the child's health and their wellbeing are at risk. And in that case, you most certainly should be working with a team of credentialed professionals and not seeking advice for your child's feeding problems from the internet or social media or bloggers, especially the ones who are selling you picky eating courses or programs.

Katie Ferraro (17m 37s):

So I personally steer clear of the term picky 'cause it does not define our children, quote unquote, picky eating is developmentally appropriate and it's not a problem to be fixed. The fifth word that I more recently have stopped using is traditional. Now I have to give credit to Gill Rapley, the founding philosopher of the Baby-Led Weaning movement for this one. We talked a lot over the years about the development of Baby-Led Weaning, where it's going as a philosophy, as an approach, as a practice. Gill Rapley co-wrote the original Baby-Led Weaning book. I highly recommend that if you're just getting started trying to learn about this philosophy. My approach is more on the food side of it as a dietitian, showing parents how to make those foods safe.

Katie Ferraro (18m 20s):

Because I know as a parent I was interested in Baby-Led Weaning, but there weren't any good resources on how to make the food safe. And so that's the area of this field. This is the problem that I feel I solve with my 100 First Foods approach. And when we're chatting about Baby-Led Weaning, a lot of times journalists and you know, cheesy click baby stuff, they like to pick like Baby-Led Weaning versus purees. Which one's better? Or like kind of put it all under the mommy wars umbrella of like you have to pick one or the other. And of course, if you've ever listened to Gill Rapley present or me talk about Baby-Led Weaning, it's not about one versus the other. Gill's talked extensively about the role of purees in starting solid foods and how you can honor the self-feeding principles of Baby-Led Weaning and still offer naturally pureed foods.

Katie Ferraro (19m 1s):

But when we're talking about juxtaposing and, and picking the language that we use when we're promoting this philosophy and practice of Baby-Led Weaning, I used to say compared to traditional spoonfeeding, and I remember interviewing Gill for some episode here on the podcast and she said, Katie, why don't you call it conventional spoon feeding? And she shies away from the term traditional. I think 'cause a lot of the emphasis on cultural foods and the implication that it might be one food culture's tradition, but that might not be another one. And so I, I teach cultural foods at the college level at a number of different colleges and we talk a lot about language and we do call them traditional diets. But when it came to Baby-Led Weaning versus shoving a spoon in the baby's mouth, I like the idea of conventional because in our western food culture, the conventional approach since the earlier part of the 20th century, has been to liquefy foods and shove them into a baby's mouth with a spoon.

Katie Ferraro (19m 60s):

And that might not be the practice of all ethnicities and cultures and races, et cetera, but in western food culture, it has been conventionally how things have been done. So I've actually, based on Gill's recommendation, I don't refer to the opposite of Baby-Led Weaning as traditional spoon feeding anymore. I call it conventional spoon feeding. So thank you Gill Rapley has a way with words as well too. And and she writes beautifully. And I love having her as a colleague and corresponding with her about this wonderful alternative to conventional adult-led spoonfeeding. That is Baby-Led Weaning. Hey, we're gonna take a quick break, but I'll be right back.

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Katie Ferraro (21m 10s):

Alright. The last word that I don't use anymore, this one's gonna throw you for a loop. If you're still listening, congratulations because the word is canola. People hate canola oil. Now I'm not gonna get into seed oils and crap crops and all that trash you hear and social media, but is definitely trickling down to like your average everyday parent. And I'll tell you a funny story. So we have a massive database of recipes. So every food on the 100 First Foods list, we have this huge database with the recipe. And the recipe starts with the name of the food from the 100 First Foods list and then what the recipe is. And so if we're doing like an Instagram reel on that, and I'm putting the actual recipe in, I'll cut and paste it from the database. And I did it like I would say this is like two years running now that I haven't said canola and canola oil.

Katie Ferraro (21m 55s):

You know, it's a, I don't even wanna get into it. It's predominantly an unsaturated fat. So from a heart healthy standpoint, we always used to lump it in. It's one of the heart healthy fats thought nothing more of it. I've never been sponsored by the canola industry. I'd never taken any money from big canola, but I cut and pasted one of the recipes or our content gal did into a ca a caption. And then we used the same recipe in our weekly roundup email. I used to do a Baby-Led Weaning recipe every Sunday and I got just one email back. But you know like that you don't, you get like 9,000 nice comments. But you remember the one bad one this mom wrote back like, you are so irresponsible. I cannot believe your recipe had canola oil in it. Unfollowing. And a couple people in the comments made of Instagram made a comment and I was like, oh wow, people are really triggered by canola oil doing some more research.

Katie Ferraro (22m 42s):

What are the concerns about canola oil? Okay, it's a highly processed oil as are most oils. It typically undergoes refining bleaching deodorizing. Yes, that leads to concerns about the use of chemicals, potential loss of nutrients, okay? And there's also concern about hexane. 'cause the extraction process for canola oil often involves the use of hexane, which is a chemical solvent. Okay? So there's also some concern about genetically modified organisms. Something I do not normally talk about in normal infant nutrition, okay? A large percentage of canola crops are genetically modified that alarms some consumers, if they're somewhat educated about nutrition science, which most people who ate canola oil are not, they'll talk about omega six fatty acids. That canola oil, like a lot of seed oils has higher rates of omega six. And if you look at human biology, our body can actually make omega six, but we actually need to be getting more omega threes from the diet, which is not found in canola oil.

Katie Ferraro (23m 30s):

But a lot of this is like misinformation and fearmongering, okay? There's a lot of misinformation that demonizes seed oils, including canola oil and claims that are not substantiated, that these oils cause chronic diseases and inflammation or toxicity. And these ideas have gained traction even though many of these claims are not supported by scientific evidence. And then this fire is fueled by viral trends like health influencers and wellness bloggers, who by the way have absolutely no scientific training and nutrition science. They're gonna promote alternatives that they're selling like coconut oil or olive oil or avocado oil, and then they're gonna dismiss canola oil. And I remember I used to be with an agency back when I was doing more family based Instagram kind of pre and during the pandemic.

Katie Ferraro (24m 11s):

And I would go to these events and I remember this one mom just like going off about crap crops. And I was like, what? What is this girl's training? She literally has absolutely no scientific background or training in nutrition. And I realized like, wow, she has a huge audience and people are listening to her. So how does that trickle down? I don't care what oil you use, to be honest, it doesn't matter. I don't have any preference for canola oil. And it made me think twice about like, why did I put canola oil? Like you know when you're baking, like you can't use olive oil for everything that you would in cooking, but like you can make an olive oil cake with olive oil, right? So some oils like from a baking and cooking standpoint perform better than others. And and with Baby-Led Weaning, we do fry a lot of foods, especially the fritters, right? Fat is your friend. When your baby is starting solid foods, the more fat that's in a food, the more liquid that it's providing to the baby, making it easier and safer to swallow.

Katie Ferraro (24m 56s):

But I don't care if you use canola or olive oil, sometimes we'll talk about the smoke point of an oil. Like avocado oil has the highest smoke point. So in many cases that's a good choice. It's freaking expensive. So it's not something that everyone can use every day. I don't use it every day. It also doesn't taste like anything. But a very mild profile is good because then it helps the flavors of the food shine when your baby's trying the new food. But at the end of the day, it made me look at my recipes and be like, why did I put canola oil when vegetable oil or just cooking oil will do? So actually we have dietetic interns that help us. And probably the worst intern project I ever had to assign that year was, please go through all my hundreds of Baby-Led Weaning recipes and find and replace. And anytime we said canola oil, put cooking oil, we did it in our 100 First Foods Daily Meal Plan as well.

Katie Ferraro (25m 38s):

So all the recipes there just say cooking oil. And then in FAQs there's the caveat like which oil's the best one to use? I actually did a whole episode on oils. I think you talked a little bit about this canola issue, but like at the end of the day, I don't really care what you think about seed oils. It doesn't matter which oil your baby eats from a nutritional standpoint, like whatever oil works for you at home and for your family and you already have on hand and you can afford or get access to, then that's the oil that you can use. Because to be honest, when you're making the quinoa fritters from our program, whether or not you use canola or avocado oil or olive oil, if you're frying them, the higher smoke point oil performs better. And that's not canola oil.

Katie Ferraro (26m 19s):

So I had to go through, well, my interns helped me and fix all of those recipes. And now you no longer will see the word canola in there because again, I don't wanna piss anyone off. If you dislike canola oil, I want your baby to eat fat with the foods. I want your baby to be able to pick up the quinoa in a fritter. And the way they do that is by frying it so you choose the oil that works for you. I'm just not gonna use the word canola anymore. Okay, that was a very fun episode to do. Thank you for listening to the 6 Words I Never Say When Babies are Starting Solid Foods, obese slash obesity, healthy enough, picky, traditional, and canola. Can't wait to hear your thoughts on canola on this one 'cause it's some people are very passionate about it. But that's all I'll say about the oils in my house other than we have a variety and a lot of it depends upon what was on sale or how it performs in the recipe.

Katie Ferraro (27m 4s):

I will link some of the other episodes that I mentioned today on the show notes page for this episode at blwpodcast.com/463. Thank you so much for listening. Special thank you to our partners at AirWave Media. If you guys like podcasts that feature food and science in using your brain, check out some of the podcasts from AirWave, we're online at blwpodcast.com. Thank you for listening. Take care.

Story Time with Philip and Mommy (27m 34s):

Hi friends. Are you looking for a new podcast? Maybe something you can share with your littles, something that has some storytelling in it. Well then look no further. We have Story Time with Philip and Mommy, where my son and I sit and discuss all the great books that you might love while we read them. So little golden books, Berenstein Bears, and even the new classics like Bluey. We sit down, we read, we discuss, and we have so much fun doing it. Come and join us. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.