BLW Basics: My Baby Isn't Eating Very Much...What's Wrong?

Katie Ferraro (0s):

The first few days your baby might pick the food up. They might not, they might put it near their face. They might put it in their hair, in their ear. And trust me after about eight weeks, that's when it all kind of clicks for baby led weaning. Hey, there I'm Katie Ferraro, Registered Dietician, college nutrition professor and mama of seven specializing in baby led weaning. Here on the baby led weaning made easy podcast, I help you strip out all of the noise and nonsense about feeding, leaving you with the competence and knowledge you need to give your baby a safe start to solid foods using baby led weaning.

Katie Ferraro (40s):

Well, Hey guys, welcome back today! Today, I'm doing another one of my BLW basics series. We're kind of going back to basics and the most frequently asked questions or concerns that parents have when their babies are starting solid foods with baby led weaning. I want to answer them for you here. So I had a question from a mom the other day, and this one is probably like when I get multiple times a day, "Help! My baby isn't eating very much, what am I doing wrong?". And this is what I hear from parents time and time again, when they're just starting out with baby led weaning. So in this episode, I want to go back to the beginning and explain to you what happens and why your baby's not eating very much at the beginning of baby led weaning and why it's not a sign that you're doing something wrong or that something's wrong with your baby because this is very, very typical early on in baby led weaning.

Katie Ferraro (1m 29s):

And they don't want to see you give up and not trust the process or go back to spoon feeding or pushing pouches of purees into your baby's mouth. Because if your baby is truly ready to start solid foods, we need to give the baby enough time to learn how to eat before we even start stressing or thinking about how much they're eating. So let's dive in baby led weaning basics - my baby, isn't eating very much, what am I doing wrong ? Now with each of these mini baby led weaning training episodes that I do, I do two episodes a week. Mondays is always a mini baby led weaning training episode like this one. Thursdays is always a guest interview with a feeding expert In the mini training ones, I love to start out with a baby led weaning tips of the day.

Katie Ferraro (2m 14s):

And the tip today is don't expect your baby to eat even anything the first few days and even weeks of baby led weaning. I generally tell parents that it can take babies four, six, sometimes even eight weeks to really get the hang of self-feeding if you wait until your baby is six months of age or six months adjusted if your baby was born prematurely. And when they're also showing reliable signs of readiness to self feed, that's the first week. Okay? So we got to wait until they're ready. If you've been doing this for longer than eight weeks, and they're still not eating anything, I want you to know that that's not typical, but most parents reach out in the fourth, fifth, six weeks.

Katie Ferraro (2m 55s):

And they're like, Katie! this baby is not eating anything. And I swear, I've been doing this forever, and I know you feel like you've been doing it forever, but really take a look at the calendar. Was your baby six months of age or six months adjusted when you saw those other reliable signs of readiness to self feed and you started ? And has it been full eight weeks that you've been doing this ? And I'm talking about doing it at least one to two times a day. Some parents are like, I mean, we're doing solids, like every three to four days. Like that's not enough. We need to be doing it multiple times a day because practice makes progress, right? But early on, please know, your baby will not be eating very much. So the tip of the day is don't stress. If your baby is not eating very much early on, because that is typical.

Katie Ferraro (3m 36s):

Now hang tight because I'm going to be sharing with you some other guidelines for what you can expect in the first few weeks. Just so you know, especially for those of you who are just learning about baby led weaning. I want you to know what to expect the first few days and weeks, so you're not like shellshocked when your baby doesn't eat very much. So the first few days, weeks, even months, if we're going up to eight weeks, right? That's two months, your baby may not eat very much and you don't need to worry. Why? Because breast milk and or formula remains the majority of your baby's nutrition early on in baby led weaning. Okay? We don't just flip a switch at the six month mark and oh my God! All the iron source from pregnancy ran out and your baby has to be getting all the nutrition from food.

Katie Ferraro (4m 16s):

It doesn't work like that. The point of the weaning process between six and twelve months of age is that we're moving your baby towards an era where your baby's going to get more nutrition from food than they get from milk. That's what happens around the one-year mark, but they also don't wake up on their first birthday, knowing how to do that if we don't give ample time for the baby to practice learning how to eat. So please, if anything, if you could remind yourself during the first few days and weeks of baby led weaning of Ellyn Satter's division of responsibility in feeding theory. Now Ellyn Satter is a Registered Dietician. She is a certified therapist. She is an expert in feeding and she left us with this beautiful list of jobs, okay? In the division of responsibility and feeding theory, we have a job. We have a couple of jobs as parents.

Katie Ferraro (4m 58s):

Your job is to take care of what the baby eats and when the baby eats and where the baby eats. So you got to pick wholesome age appropriate foods. That's the what. You got to pick when at meal times babies don't get to eat all day and you got to pick the where that's safely seated in a high chair with their feet, resting flat on a solid foot rest to help support a safe swallow. What and where, and when that's your job. But guess what? Baby is ultimately the one who decides how much or even whether they eat. So it's not your job when you feel bad. Oh my God, my baby's not eating enough. Guess what? Not your job, not your problem. You got to do your job. And eventually your baby will learn how to do his job or her job, but they need the opportunity to practice. So at six and seven months of age, when you're just starting out with baby led, weaning, try to offer solid foods to your baby one to two times per day if you can.

Katie Ferraro (5m 41s):

If you can do more cool, two or three times, I give those guidelines because some families again are like, I'm just doing this every three days. That's not enough. One to two times a day at the beginning, bump it up to two to three when you're ready to. You should be sitting down and taking care of yourself, eating a meal for 15 or 20 minutes, a few times a day, make your baby's mealtimes an extension of your own break for yourself. Cause we never want to leave our babies unattended at the high chair. The first few days your baby might pick the food up. They might not. They might put it near their face. They might put it in their hair, in their ear. That is all part of the full sensory experience that is learning how to eat. So even though you may be like, especially my dietician mamas out there, they don't get any calories. It doesn't matter. They're not equipped to get calories from food yet because they need to learn how to eat before food can make up more of their nutrition intake than milk.

Katie Ferraro (6m 28s):

Okay? So this is a continuum. Baby led weaning is a period. It starts slow. And trust me after about eight weeks, the vast majority of babies and families that I work with, that's when it all kind of clicks for baby led weaning. And so often Terrence reach out to me when they're struggling. And I feel like I don't always get to hear like the good stuff, but the golden age of baby led weaning for most babies is after they've been self-feeding for eight weeks or so. And then the next two months are amazing. Your baby's feeding everything. You're starting to drop a milk feed. They're interested in different textures. You've done all the allergenic foods. You're cruising through meats and you're like, oh my gosh, this is why I decided to do this. Now you'll hit a rocky patch around 10 months.

Katie Ferraro (7m 8s):

We're going to talk about that in a separate episode. But again, take a close look at the calendar. And I know it feels like it's been a long time, cause you're like, oh my gosh, this baby hasn't actually eaten anything in the first few days or weeks. But please know that that's typical. And please don't give up and please don't say, oh, well I need to finish this meal off with a pouch so that they could and could, get enough. As Gill Rapley said so brilliantly on a recent interview that we did together, your baby is not going to starve himself. It's true. They're not, they're going to get most of the nutrition they need from breast milk or formula. And if you give them the opportunity to practice eating, they're going to figure it out. But please don't stop or stress if your baby is not eating very much. Don't count calories. Don't look at portion sizes, don't weigh foods.

Katie Ferraro (7m 48s):

I had a mom telling me she was weighing the food that fell on the floor and subtracting it from what she had offered to try to figure out how many milligrams of iron the baby was eating. You guys, that is not part of a learning how to eat process. We need to step back. Remember our jobs ,stay in our lane. It's not our job to determine how much or even whether the baby eats, but it is our job to make sure we're offering the what, the when and the where appropriately. So if you find yourself stressing out during the first few days and weeks of baby led weaning, take a deep breath, look at the calendar, see how long you've been doing this for. Note that it's typical that most babies don't eat very much early on in baby led weaning. They're still getting most of their nutrition from breast milk or formula. Don't compare your baby to anybody else's baby, give your baby lots of opportunity to practice learning how to eat.

Katie Ferraro (8m 33s):

And if all of this baby led weaning stuff is new to you, I have a free online workshop called baby led weaning for beginners. It's all about how to get your baby to eat 100 foods before turning one, without you having to spoon feed purees or buy pouches. And everyone on this workshop gets a copy of my hundred first foods list. So if you're all struggling about what types of food your baby can be eating, come and check out the free workshop. I'm going to link to the registration times for this week's workshop at the show notes page for this episode, which you can find at BLWpodcast.com/145. Thanks so much for listening and I'll see you next time.